Moving...and other stuff...

First off, let me apologize (AGAIN) for disappearing off the face of the earth. This is what summer does to me. But I think summer is a good enough excuse...sort of... When you're homeschooled, Summer can do dangerous things to you...

And secondly, I'm not moving literally (thank goodness. Not planning to move anytime soon...). I've decided to 'move' to a different blog, for a number of reasons. I'll give you the url in a bit - it only has like, one post so far. I'll miss this dear blog that I've started four years ago in '07, with all its weird and childish or childlike compositions and ramblings. But I think it's time to grow up a little bit. And there have been a lot of other changes in life too, so I thought, 'oh, might as well'. (as if I couldn't handle one blog enough XD)
In my new blog I will try to post more meditations and the like (I never knew how much improvement it did to my writing skills), as well as music videos and maybe some book reviews. But I'm afraid I don't have time to post my old "saints' stuff" like I did when I was...er, younger. That was fun, though. And even though I stopped that a long time ago, I'll miss that as well...

Another big change is that I have changed my username to 'Akalei'. That is my name in Hawaiian, and Charity Therese is/was only my pen name. I go by Akalei in a lot of other things and places, and it's also my artist name. So it should be easier to recognize me...sort of. I'll miss being called 'CT' though!

So...if there are any readers left out there, thank you for your patience! This will be one of my last posts here. All your sweet comments (if there are any left, lol) and sharings and such have been much appreciated. Thank you for taking your time to read this neglected blog. :)

What love really means...

A sweet song I came across. ^^ Took me forever to find what it was! Hope you enjoy it as much as I did. :)

Fruitful Baskets!

Just kidding. So, for this post I thought I'd do something a little different.

Lately, I've been reading this manga series that my friends recommended. Fruits Basket by Natsuki Tayaka. Please don't panic and leave this webpage yet! To be honest, I'm not much of an otaku (aka a manga fan...an obsessive manga/anime fan...). Although I DO really enjoy reading and drawing in the manga/anime style, I don't usually read manga or watch anime on a regular basis. But this story has a lot of good points, like any regular book might have. I'd recommend it for any interested kids aged 14 or 15 and up. (or maybe younger, as long as you stop around volume 14-ish)There are a few questionable details here and there, but the overall story is excellent and provides a lot of extra reflection.

Anyway.
This story is about a teenage optimistic and sweet, innocent orphan girl who lives with another troubled family. A family with a curse. Whenever a family member is hugged by someone of the opposite gender, they turn into an animal of the Zodiac (tiger, ox, rat, dog, etc). Now it doesn't sound so bad, but that's what causes a lot of problems. Because of this curse, they are weighed down by their own problems; blame and rejection from their parents and family, loss of loved ones, and utter fear of the world coldheartedness.
Tohru Honda (the orphan girl) simply encourages the family members to get along, and often looks on the bright side to inspire them. Even though she has her own problems too, like the death of her parents and such, she always puts this family in front of own things, and makes sure they're doing their best to be happy. That's basically it, but Tohru is a truly inspiration character and model. I can't say much more about it, otherwise I'd be giving the story away.
But some of the other characters/family members have some pretty good qualities too. You can see throughout the story that they do learn, accept, and then let go. Be warned though, the story can be a little depressing, for there can't actually be a satisfying answer to every problem for everyone. In order for a happy ending, there is a lot of self-sacrificing the characters make, and lots of change of heart. It's something that is much needed in this world today, and that's why I like this series so much. Quite sweet and touching. The story got me teary-eyed too...another good reason to read it... At the end of the series, I was thinking that maybe if we'd just follow the wonderful qualities the characters possess, then maybe we could provide basketful of fruits for God?

But it really doesn't look it though, doesn't it?
Usually when you see manga or anime, it's kind of 'eeh...' :P But this one is mostly good. If you're old enough and right in the head, it's quite enjoyable. (I hear it's usually the first manga anyone reads) Kind of funny too. :) Again, there are a few questionable details. Like the whole Zodiac thing? But what about the whole Harry Potter thing? It's not like we're gonna run around waving wands in everyone's faces and battle nose-less guys.

When I grow up...I'm going to be a little kid.

"Life was so much simpler when our definition of drama was someone stealing our crayons, and our biggest fears were catching cooties or missing nap time."

A friend of mine said that, on a recent status on Facebook. I responded with a "Ah yes, such sweet memories."
Nowadays, (and I'm sure nowadays will stretch for the rest of my years) I've been kind of missing those kinds of things. I mean, now we can't find anything simple. Can't even define normal OR simple anymore. It wasn't like that when we were little, when we could fall as many times as we wanted, and it wouldn't hurt as much as it does now. Such a superpower, huh?

Unfortunately, it's an impossible wish to be completely back in the good old days, where everything was simple and carefree. And fun. And when Mr. Rogers never seemed to age. And when everyone thought Magenta from Blues Clues was a girl. And when you thought swings couldn't swing high enough...
I could go on forever, but you get the point. My friend was saying that he wished that things could be simple again, carefree, etc...
I responded so: "I think you still could though, in a way...like when we were little, falling didn't hurt as much, probably because we always knew and trusted that someone would always be there to pick us up. I think now that we're older, and feel pain a lot differently, that kind of trust fades off...and we kind of forget that there's Someone else who can always pick us up, in any of our worst kinds of fallings. 'Cause there's always something better out there, better than having the most epic color pencils and light-up shoes that God has in store for us."

We'll always be a little kid at heart, but we know that doesn't completely erase our problems. Sometimes we wish we could be content with the simplest things, like what I mentioned above. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. God didn't create us to live for color pencils, playgrounds, giant slides (but if you somehow ended up with that kind of vocation, I have to say that I am EXTREMELY jealous.), He has something better. And, sticking those pictures of sweet childhood memories to our fridges, we can get there with that childlike heart. We're just gonna have to trust God a little more to do more than just pick us up. :) He can lift us up and make us soar.

I'm still alive...

I totally apologize for the disappearance (AGAIN). You have no idea how many times I tried to get into my blogger account! I even tried commenting on my previous post to let my readers know that I couldn't access my account, but then realized that I had 'locked' my comment box so that I could only publish it once I was logged in as blog administer. (Yep, epic fail.)
So there I was furiously typing in my password again and again and again and again to absolutely no avail, when I FINALLY saw those three little words and a question mark.

Forgot your password?

Thank God for people who have pity on airheads like me.

Anyway, I will get back to posting soon. Thank you for your amazing patience, and I apologize again for the inconvenience!

Happy Easter!

I was so excited after Easter Vigil, that I almost said 'Merry Christmas' after Mass. :) Wishing you all a blessed and joyful Easter season!

Palm Sunday

Wishing all my dear friends and readers a blessed Holy Week. :) Here's an amazing short film I found last night - thought I'd share it! (and yes, it's worth watching.)



'Til Easter, everyone! Almost there!

Halfway there...

Are we all 'ohmigosh, that was fast' or, '...not fast enough...'? ;)
Lent is a good time to clean out all the lint in our 'dryers' before we come out all fresh and clean. :)

Anyways, I don't have much to write about right now, but here's a nice song that I wanted to share.
Sometimes (well, not sometimes, all the time!) God just longs to be our everything. And He is. How big, or what's the definition of our 'everything'? What or who is our everything now?

Rest assured...

...I have NOT fallen off the face of the earth, thank God. I've just slipped. ;)

I know, where in the world has this writer gone to, especially before Lent? Doesn't she owe you a post? Yes, I do owe you a post. In fact, I'll give you this one long post!

I'll spare you on the details, but things in life have been changing. A lot. Besides the annoying teenager hormones and my siblings who are almost ALL taller than me (except for one...) and the war with acne finally subsiding, of course.

It's mostly about growing up, that's been 'up' lately. I know, all of the above were about growing up...but...ok, read at little bit more and you'll find out.

First of all, it just hit me that I AM a teenager. girl. With a face and some sort of aura God created me to have, and that eventually, a boy or two...or five...will notice. Scary thought, ya? I totally agree. I say I need a frying pan or two to keep those buggies away.
Okay, I didn't mean that seriously (well...maybe a little... :P ;) ), I DO have some really nice friends who are guys. Yes, they all ARE scary, immature, and childish at times, but it took me a while to realize they're just little boys...with big hearts.
And NO, I know what you're thinking, but no. Miss CT is not planning on dating anytime soon, noooo sireee... Like I said, rest assured. I believe that those kind of relationships should first and foremost be built upon Christ's holy and pure love, as we build our friendship as true brothers and sisters - whether we feel any 'feelings' or not, or whether things would work out the way we think they will or not. That goes for every kind of relationship. You just need to make sure it's firm and strongly built, not on sand, but on a nice sturdy Rock. But I'm not going further there, (unless you want me to) so please bear with me as I hop onto the next paragraph.
So there you have it. I'm being chased around by boys - a position I have never thought of being pulled into... I know that's very un-girly of me, but I assure you that I am not even close to an average Catholic teenage girl. (Weird, huh? It's like I see romance as the worst thing that could ever happen to me! lol. But no, it's definitely not worst thing that could happen to me, it just may not be for me yet.) The situation used to bother me a lot. Not much these days. It's not the fact that I am being chased around that bothers me the most, it's the horrid fact that when I give them a 'no', they break...and so do I.
The first time happened a couple of years ago - a total bolt from the blue. He was a friend from Church, and I didn't know him that well. When I realized of the drama he was asking of me, I was totally dazed. Just by the thought of that 'boyfriend/girlfriend' relationship, I felt sick and ruined. I never wanted anyone to like me in that way. ...So obviously, nothing ever came out of it. It hurt my friend for a while, but he's alright now. But that was the first time. Now it's like I have every guy I know under suspicion of 'chasing me'.

So let me fast-forward to last month. I had been completely devastated over this fact that bore the question: How far am I supposed to go to love people??
I don't want to boys to keep falling for me, only for them to go away with a broken heart. Of course, I guard my heart pretty well - I'm definitely not an easy fish to catch, as they have learned very well. I asked myself, did/am I doing something wrong?? I put up more 'walls'. But they follow me anyway. I was disgusted with myself. Felt like the only person who hated me, was me. And if you haven't guessed yet, I DO care for my guy friends, whether they want to chase me or not. It's just that the matter is so fragile and complicated...I don't want to be the one to cause the pain. I know and knew what St. Paul was saying 'Love is patient, Love is kind...' And I do want to potray that perfect love with all my heart to everyone, (as everbody should desire that! I hope.) but... How far should I go before somebody's heart breaks? If not theirs, what about mine? Can't I be a better friend and spare everybody of wasted pain?

I decided to pray on this at an Adoration night...
And I got my answer.

"Love until it hurts."
Me: Whaaaat? That doesn't help at all. Love 'til it hurts - how do you do that???
Then I raise my eyes from the Eucharist and freeze at it rests on my Lover hanging on the Cross.
I was all, "Ohh." (*buries face in arms*)
'Love until it hurts'... I had missed one important part of St. Paul's definition of love: Love endures all things.

...I'll end that part of this post there. But before I go on...
Um, honestly? Right now, I'm still wrapping my mind around that. I feel more assured and confident about matter, but not 100%. Really, if we were 100% ok about everything - sure things would be a lot easier - but life would be so boring, don't you agree?! It's testing that faith, hope, and love that bring out the beautiful things in life.

Anyway. I do suppose I owe you a post on Lent.
Now, I've said a lot about Lent before in the past, so I don't want to repeat myself here... But here's something that I've gotten out of Lent so far.
One of my resolutions was to give up my extra computer time. Yes, facebook too. But I didn't say I was giving up facebook entirely.
Why? Not just because some of my friends aren't giving up facebook. I had decided on using facebook to reach out to my friends in need, in whatever distress or problems they were going through. One of my friends lost his job. Another one of my friends needed encouragement and someone to talk to. So far, it's gone pretty alright, except for the fact that facebook has some pretty nasty glitches that make me miss messages... :P
Anyways. Besides that, I realized that without all that extra time to play around on facebook, 'stalk' my lovable friends and read all their posts, play with the flair apps and bejeweled games...the days suddenly got longer. I'm not kidding! I find my afternoon hours so long and empty. Especially 3-6pm. Then it hit me: What in the world do I do for 2-3 hours on facebook?? There's a lot I could do in three hours without facebook. Cook, clean, draw some saint pics, write a song, watch some VeggieTales stuff with my siblings...and well, blog.
It made me think, if we gave up something that consumes so much of our time, then what could we do to fit in those hours that would make our days so much longer and fulfilling? I find that if time feels slow, it means you do a lot in your day and get a lot out of it.

Next week we'll be halfway finished through Lent. Has time been seemingly slow for you or not? :)

pic source

It's quiet here...

Yeah, sorry about that... I've been getting over this horrible stomach flu. I'm still recovering. But I can manage to sneak in a post. ^_^

First off, it's my first post of 2011! :D Yay! Happy New Year friends!

So, do I have lots of check marks on my old "New Years Resolutions for 2010" list?
Yes...and no...noooo......but it turned out to be so much better. :)
I got to develop my writing and art skills quite well. So that's a check. But no, I did not join the Honolulu Marathon, and I barely ran all year... :P And, as you can obviously tell, I did not give an amount of two posts per month. I posted more than I expected I wouuld, but not as much as I'd like myself to...
But I learned a lot. A lot more than what I had expected. And that's got to be the biggest check on my resolutions list of 2010 than any of them.
I guess that's another funny thing...We can make our goals, but God takes them and makes them awesomer beyond our imagination. He takes what we have, and replaces it with something MORE.

I won't lie, it's been a difficult year, despite all the joys and accomplishments. My family and I had to move again, and that hurt just to know that after four years, we STILL haven't found the right home/house for us. I know God does indeed have that home prepared for us, but sometimes the waiting just tears me apart...
Anyways. Concerning school, 2010 didn't kill me. I think it decided to give 2011 the honor...
Emotionally...and in personal issues... There were quite few of those things that were difficult. Those stuff never bothered me before. I've always just avoided them. 2010 showered me with lots of things to think about - I'm a growing teenger. I'll spare you the drastic boring details, and well, the whole story, but I stepped into the great teenager world (if you're homeschooled, your launch happens late =D). But no worries, I've got a frying pan at my side to whack the weirdos who decide to stalk me. ;)
I basically did say a lot more in my other posts, so I'll go on. :P

I thought last year was going to be different...no, this year would probably have the most changes.
My sister is going to college. College! Noo, I didn't think we'd still be alive by then!!
I'm supposed to be a senior in highschool this year. I was thinking about enrolling in a homeschool program called Seton, so I could fly to Virginia in 2012 to receive my diploma. It'd be fun. But if you know Seton, then you know that I probably won't get there alive...lol. ;) But, we'll see...I still have to do a PSAT and then an SAT. Please keep me in prayers on that school stuff... Oh right. And I'm going to start driving this year. =] Yeah, you might want to pray for me on that too.

Anyways, that's enough for now. To close this little update, here's a favorite song of mine. :) It's helped me so much. I hope it touches you as it did to me. :)